9-8-09
my plans for revising my paper include using more first hand accounts of my story, i will need to make my paper not bounce around too much. right now it is not in order and the grammar seems out of place in some points. i will also have some of my close associates in my dorm room help read my paper and give me some suggestions onto how he thinks i can write my paper better. i will also plan to fix all of my spelling errors that spell check did not pick up because they are the real words. i wrote in my first paragraph with a bad opening and i need to change how i start my story. i will also need to revise my ending because the current one i have right now just cuts off and it needs more writting in it to be complete. i could also add more words since my paper is currently at 375 words and it could go up to 500. i could easily make my stories more in depth and attempt to make the reader feel more involved with my story. the more i brainstorm on what i plan on doing the better chance i have on knowing what to write.