Today during our small group critiques, a few classmates and my teacher critiqued my storyboard I had drawn out. I admit bits and pieces of it were a bit choppy and it left a few loose ends open, but they all gave me quite a few suggestions to help fix the story up a bit and I’ll definitely consider them and give my storyboard a good run-through and redo and rethink some things.
Some suggestions that were made:
– Get rid of Directions. Colosseum based off compass stays but no need to show Directions.
– Characters aren’t chained together until near the end of the animation.
– Foreshadow the Queen’s thrown crumbling near the start of the animation.
– Get rid of whole gun shooting scene. Instead of girl hitting bullet away it transitions back to her swinging at the Gator and hitting something harder instead.
– They make their escape because the wall/Queen’s thrown crumbles down due to destruction and acid taking effect.
– Queen herself chains them together as they make their escape. While she falls or something along those lines.
– There are 3 paths at the beginning, both want to go different ways, ends with them going down the center.
– Ends with the chain breaking for some reason and them leaving each other but then deciding to come back together and stay together. Still need to figure out how/why the chain’s going to break.
My next step is fixing up the story with these suggestions and make an animatic hopefully by the formal defense by next Tuesday.
