Claiborne’s Blog

There were many key points that we talked about in class on Friday. They obviously all revolved around plagarism, but some stuck out more than others. One of the things we discussed was that when you allow your roomate, friend, parent, or english teacher (etc.) read over and fix your essay, that is considered plagarism. We also discussed that obviously copying and pasting is plagarism, but changing around the words into “your own words” is also considered cheating. This is because the original idea or thought is still being taken or stolen from the source you took it from or referred to. Another key point that stuck out was that it is considered cheating to use papers from other classes or previous years. All of these examples are considered cheating and are academically UNhonest, and will be resolved with consequences even to a point of being expelled from the University.

I have decided to write on the second prompt, which discusses whether parents should have access to their  teens online accounts or not. The reason I chose this prompt is because I think that this is an issue that every family in society today struggles with.  It is such a common debate that almost everyone who uses technolody is aware of. My belief is that parents should be able to monitor their teenagers online accounts. The main reason I support this statement is because teenagers do not fully understand the risks and dangers of being on the internet, and are oblivious to the variation of ways they are “putting theirself out there” for anyone to see. If their parents are monitoring their web accounts, they will have the opportunity to be shown what they are doing wrong, as well as what they can (and should) do to put themselves in a safer situation. Teenagers are struggling with the changes in their adolescent lives, and can be rebellious in most cases. Being able to explore the internet feels like a freedom for them because they can act however they want rather than the way they act in front of their parents, teachers, etc. One example of this is how some teens post nude images of themselves online. By doing this, they are putting themselves in great danger. What the teens do not know is that anyone can view that image, not just the people they are sending it to. The teen might harmed by bullies if they see the image, or even worse physically harmed by a sex offender.  It is very important that parents monitor their teenagers online accounts because not only will it keep them out of trouble, but more importantly it could keep them from getting harmed in either verbal or physical ways.

PART 1

                The main point that I learned from the video clips was that arguments are completely different than contradictions. An argument is an attempt to persuade someone to see a better, different perspective. The purpose of an argument is to make something clear, or to make a point. An argument can be defined as a disagreement or opposition. They are, or should be, supported with a variety of reasons or statements. These statements should be debateable and able to uplift a thorough discussion. An argument should be persuasive to urge the audience to choose that side of the argument. Also, arguments should have a main point or thesis that is clear to the audience. On the other hand, a contradiction consists of two simple statements that cannot both be agreed upon without being hypocritical. Also, a contradiction isn’t being fought over, but is rather choosing one statement over another. Contradiction could be defined as an assertion of the opposite or contrary. When two statements are being contradicted, one of the statements must reject atleast one of the supporting reasons of the other statement. In other words, the two statements are viewed as being incompatible. Overall, what I learned from watching the video clips is that an argument is a discourse while a contradiction does not require a discourse.

PART 2

-opinions

– statistics

– examples

-comparisson

– definition

– address the counterargument

                It is important to support an argument because any extra information helps to strengthen the credibility of a claim. When someone supports an argument by using a comparisson, they are able to directly show why their side of the argument is better than the other side. A crucial way people should support their arguments is by appealing to the audience because you can refer to their needs, values, or concerns. This is important because it will get the audience to support your side of the argument. It was also cause them to take interest in your side of the argument and perhaps go against the other side of the argument. Another way supports in arguments are effective is the way they address the counterargument. By addressing the counterargument you are able to acknowledge the opposing statements and explain why your statements are stronger and more factual. This also gives you the opportunity to demonstrate the weak supports on the counterargument. By using examples to support your argument, you are able to give your statement more credibility. Whether the examples are hypothetical or real, they allow the audience to connect with your argument because they can refer to the people or events that you demonstrated. Supports are needed when an argument may not appear stable or factual. By adding support or reason, you are able to show why the statement is true, perhaps by using facts or examples.

Outside of class, I am going to create an outline based on what I have written in my essay. Then I will examine the essay to make sure that the structure of my essay makes sense. I feel that this will be a good revising technique because it will truly portray whether my essay is in order and if the paragraphs flow into one another.

Claiborne Vonier

GSW 1110 – 1096                                                          

There are several things I have done to revise my This I Believe essay. In class, we had peer reviews so I was able to view comments from other students. From this activity I was able to revise my essay in the areas other students pointed out. Another revising technique I used was that I let my draft “cool,” so I waited a while after I wrote the draft to revise it. I also read my essay out loud several times so that I could more easily check to make sure the grammar and sentence structure made sense. Also, I completed the checklist on page 75 in our textbook, A Writer’s Resource.  This guided me to focus on the strengths as well as the weaknesses in my essay. Another thing that I made sure I completed in my essay was that I gave examples that supported my value of purpose. This helped to make sure my essay was specific and supported the reasons that I stated throughout the paragraphs. One other way I revised my essay was by asking for more feedback. I had my roommate as well as one of her friends read over it and give me their opinions. Although they initially thought the essay was well written, I urged them to look for weaknesses so that I could improve my writing skills. After they found some errors, I was able to further advance my essay to make it more well-written.

–          Many of them felt a new feeling at some point in their life

                Ex.  1) Jackie Robinson’s “Free Minds and Hearts at Work”

“At the beginning of the World Series of 1947, I experienced a completely new  emotion, when the National Anthem was played.”

                                       2) Brian Greene’s “Science Nourishes the Mind and the Soul”

“One day when I was about 11, walking back to Public School 87 in Manhattan after our class visit to the Hayden Planetarium, I became overwhelmed by a feeling I’d never had before.”

                             3) Isabel Allende’s “In Giving I Connect with Others”

“I never had time to think about my beliefs until my 28-year-old daughter Paula fell ill.”

–          Many of them had some sort of problem throughout their life

Ex. 1) Isabel Allende’s “In Giving I Connect with Others”

“..my 28-year-old daughter Paula fell ill. She was in a coma for a year and I took care of her at home, until she died in my arms in December of 1992.”

                                      2) Eve Birch’s “The Art of Being a Neighbor”

“One year, through a series of unhappy events, it all fell apart. I found myself homeless and alone. I had my truck and $56.”

                             3) Jackie Robinson’s “Free Minds and Hearts at Work”

“On the field, for the first time in Atlanta, there were Negroes and whites. … Whatever obstacles I found made me fight all the harder.”

–           Many of them wanted or worked towards something, or persuaded other to do the same thing

Ex. 1) Eve Birch’s “The Art of Being a Neighbor”

“I used to believe in the American dream that meant a job, a mortgage, cable, credit, warrantees, success. I wanted it and worked toward it like everyone else, all of us separately chasing the same thing.”

     2) Jackie Robinson’s “Free Minds and Hearts at Work”

“And to myself I can say that, because progress is unalterable, many of today’s dogmas will have vanished by the time they grow into adults. I can say to my children: There is a chance for you. No guarantee, but a chance.”

            The goals of a This I Believe essay are quite simple. If you wish to write an essay then you must be willing to portray a life philosophy that you believe in or follow. For some people, this philosophy has been caused by a new feeling or emotion they have experienced in life. For others this philosophy may have been created by a problem they have either suffered or overcame once or throughout their lifetime. The main goal of a This I Believe essay is not only to portray your personal life philosophy, but also to persuade the readers to work towards or believe in something much like you did as you showed in your This I Believe essay.

In my opinion, writing is important because it gives people an opportunity to portray their values, beliefs, or morals. Writing allows people to express themselves and show their emotions towards certain topics, events, or people. I also believe that writing is important because it is good for individuals to practice writing through a variety of writing techniques.

I believe that writing is important because it is wonderful practice for students and adults alike. Writing gives people the opportunity to advance their education and express themselves in new ways that might be new to others.

Writing is important because you need to practice different writing styles. When you grow older, you will be able to explore many new writing styles. This is why you need to write now when you are young, that way when you are older you are prepared to learn how to become an even better writer.